Posts tagged Truthiness
Inept
who has too many thoughts
The most common negative comment that I hear is that my clothing choice is (you guessed it) gay, because clearly, the only reason anyone would wear a skirt or pair of high heels is to please and attract a man. I don’t believe for a second that most women truly factor that in when they get dressed every day (“Which of these prints is most likely to land me a boyfriend today?”), and to really believe so seems very sexist to me. Of course, we all know how much gay men are attracted to women, so surely me wearing a skirt is a clear signal that I’m interested in men.
Stepping beyond “Because I want to” the most simple answer becomes, “Because I like the way it looks.” A part of me has just always loved the aesthetics of the clothing marketed towards women, and I want to wear the clothes that appeal to me. So, to those who take issue with the freedom of my sartorial choices, just remember, it’s got nothing to do with you, it’s all about me.
Adulting: Step 213: Do not comment on things people are, comment on things they do
The simplest example of this is not telling a tall person that they’re tall.
So much of our lives are shaped by weird rolls of the genetic dice, or fate, or God, or however you choose to interpret that particular mystery. Whether someone is short or tall or originally from Canada or gay or Asian…
I’ve been having issues with wanting things lately. Something in my brain, part from my family and part from society and maybe part just me, tells me that simply wanting a thing isn’t a good enough reason to do it. It tells me that wanting is inherently selfish and unbecoming, that wants must always be placed below all other considerations. I can do a thing because it’s healthy, because it’s feminist, because it makes other people happy, because it’s educational. I can’t do it just because I want to.
(This has not made me a beautifully selfless and giving person. More “neurotic and passive.”)
Sooner or later in life everyone discovers that perfect happiness is unrealizable, but there are few who pause to consider the antithesis: that perfect unhappiness is equally unattainable.
I’ve been very aware ever since I was a child how futile it is to start categorising. I know that sexually I am a lot more drawn to women than I am to men. But I do find it hard to define myself, because as soon as you state one thing, you deny everything else. Some people know exactly who they are and what they want to do. I don’t have that. I feel wider… not deeper or cleverer or anything, just wider…
Rupert Graves, Actor (via bestbandquotes)
See, this is what I just adore about Rupert. He’s so open about these things. Most actors won’t bring up sexuality at all, but Rupert’s so comfortable discussing these things and he’s just so sincere and honest about himself.
(via astudyinlestrade)
(via clavicularity)
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But like deciding to devote a book to a character from literary canon or a figure from history whose previously consigned to obscurity does not automatically win you the mantle of being a Feminist Writer with a capital F or even a woman-friendly one.
Especially if the route you choose to take to make said character likable and/or sympathetic is to set them on one end of a spectrum (be it “good” or “clever” or “normal” or whatever one-note trait you decide to centre their characterisation round) whilst placing a stick figure version of another woman (typically better known and/or exalted) at the other end, for readers to essentially hiss at whenever they draw close.
That is not “being woman-friendly” and worse still, it’s plain lazy writing to bring characters into being for the sheer sake of having them “liked” or “disliked”. Of course, villains are a narrative necessity but good villains are not created in vacuums - you can still give your heroine an antagonist without reducing them both to single-characteristic templates.
You can write a good novel about Mary Boleyn without tearing down Anne Boleyn. You can write a good novel about Morgan le Fey without tearing down Guinevere. You can write a good novel about Penelope without tearing down Helen of Troy. I could go on.
And if you can’t…well you don’t deserve to be valourised as a good writer and you certainly don’t deserve any feminist medals, goddamn.
(via acaele)
Oh, this was that one line of this episode that I really, really liked. <3
(via fairestcat)
Queer people do not need to offer excuses or defend their own existence. If one could become queer by simply waking up one morning and deciding to become queer, for a day, for an hour, it wouldn’t change the fact that being queer is just as good, as valid, as worthy, as being straight. Providing straight people with reasons or excuses for our queerness simply confirms their suspicions that our sexuality really is their business and that we need to justify our existence to them. This allows heterosexists to continue to believe there is something superior about heterosexuality, and that being queer is a deviation from some kind of normal or default sexuality. There isn’t and it’s not.
We don’t need to justify ourselves to anyone. We don’t need a reason to be queer. Maybe we were born this way, maybe we weren’t. Maybe sexuality is fluid for some people and not for others. It’s totally irrelevant either way. The message we need to send to heterosexists is not that our sexuality was foisted upon us and that they should be “tolerant” and “understanding”. The message is: our sexuality is perfectly valid and none of your business, we offer you no excuses, and we are never going away.
Love.
There are kind Slytherins.
There are brave Hufflepuffs.
There are stupid Ravenclaws.
There are twisted Gryffindors.
Other people’s perceptions of your house shouldn’t define you.
(via captaineli)
[…] Goddesses are often known to support patriarchal social customs. Goddesses may have nothing whatsoever to do with women’s religious needs, representing instead men’s fantasies […]. Goddesses may be strongly, if ambivalently, distinguished from human women, and the differences between the two repeatedly emphasized: that is, goddesses “accentuate what womanhood is not” as often as they reflect a culture’s notions of what women are. […] Goddess worship has been reported for societies rife with misogyny, and at times goddesses even seem to provide justification for beliefs and practices that are antiwoman. Contrariwise, the worship of male gods can coincide with relatively great power for women. There is simply no one-to-one relationship between goddess worship and high status for women.